Male or female, mother or not you have experienced this….
What happens when you look at this photo? I expect that your heart melts, I know mine did. Oprah once said I believe the choice to become a mother is the choice to become one of the greatest spiritual teachers there is. As I feel into that statement it really resonates. Motherhood is probably one of the toughest challenges you can face especially when your children get to the teen years. I laugh now as I can be on a call with a client and one of my teens is either calling for me at the top of her voice or barging into my office without checking first.
The significance of Ancient Mother
Whether or not you are a mother you will have your own experience of being mothered. And beyond all of those personal stories there is the fact that we are connected to the Divine Feminine. The Divine Feminine also known as Ancient Mother is what provides our connection to Earth. She is the creator of all things.
This can be hard to accept because the Catholic Church which shaped our reality for centuries refused to acknowledge the role of the Feminine. As in His Dark Materials where the magisterium experiment with ways of removing children’s daemons so in our world the Church cut off access to the Divine Feminine. It was only in 2016 that said Church recognised Mary Magdalene. Even then it was not as an apostle but as the apostle of the apostles so one step removed.
For the last 2000 years we have live in a patriarchy which has coloured our view of women and the Divine Feminine. We can see that also in terms of the archetypes we have for women – the mother or the prostitute.
What plays out at the micro level
In some ways all this informs our own relationships with our mothers. For many years I wasn’t in relationship with my mother rather I was in relationship with my opinion of her. I saw her as harsh, critical and judging. And failed to see where she was being a mirror back to me. In not accepting my mother as she was I was unable to really see myself, my mother or my girls fully.
Where are your blind spots? Where are the wounds you cannot face yet?
Working on your self is the key to change. Few can change the world but it is possible to bring warmth and love into your own setting. I have a big vision about the kind of world I want to be part of. And at times my impatience with daily life is palpable. And so I learn to forgive myself and smile as I see how far I have come.
There’s always a gift
For me this week I felt tears in my eyes as I relayed how I had experienced the deepening of the bond between me and one of my daughters. She shared with me what it feels like to be dyslexic – the anxiety and confusion that she feels at school which she hides beneath a facade of politeness. At home where she feels safe, her frustration boils over often at me because she needs an outlet for her feelings.
This breakthrough was possible as I decided to take on the idea of returning non love with love. A radical concept which isn’t always easy; it resonated with me profoundly when I heard it during my Gene Key retreat. What would your life be like if you embraced this maxim?
Being broken open by life is a gift because it gives you an opportunity to wake up to what is truly important. This week for me the most memorable moment was that deep sharing with my daughter. That’s why I tend to agree with those that say motherhood is a form of initiation. That said whether you are male or female, a mother or not you will have been shaped by your own experience of motherhood. At a macro level we are all influenced by the way that the Church chose to see women and the Divine Feminine whether we are aware of it or not. And this is also important because it can explain why some turn a blind eye to abuse. If you want to go deeper into this theme watch my video on ancient mother.