So why is my focus on health, well being and personal development? Why do I encourage people to invest in themselves? It is not to make money although I love the fact that I can live a spiritual life and be in flow. It is because I want to bust the myth that money is the key to feeling content. Financial success does not lead to inner peace. Money is a by –product something we created not that long ago and now so many are a slave to it: too afraid to follow their dreams because if they fail they think they will have no value. I would like to share some of my story to give you hope that another way is possible.
Just over 10 years ago, I had a terrible shock, my husband whom I saw as my rock was called up to serve in Iraq to help rebuild society post the war. In fact it was a much more dangerous time in that country because of the level of unrest and the chaos that the war had created. The worst time was our anniversary. He had promised to call and I sat by the phone and no call came through. You can probably imagine the thoughts that I had. It was at least 24 hours before I heard from him and I was very grateful that I was with my parents-in-law at that time. It turned out that the communication lines went dark because a soldier had been killed on active duty and the military’s first priority was to contact his family.
Contentment and inner peace do not come from being in relationship with another
I spent most of 2004 on my own and it was the year I discovered reiki, a form of energy healing, and perhaps more importantly I learnt to let go of dependency on another for my happiness. Tough though the year was on so many levels, it was a blessing because I learnt a lot. I also realised that working in a corporate environment did not suit me. Although I had a three year break during the birth of my children, it was another eight years before I left for good to set up my company.
The transition from employment to self-employment was a big leap. I know because it took me two attempts to get into my stride and find a way of being with it that worked. Initially I used to panic because I never knew how much I would earn and the amounts varied enormously. At that point being an entrepreneur was too stressful so I quit and went back to a corporate role for almost two years before I said to myself enough is enough. What’s the difference this time? A number of things have changed. I have never stopped working on myself and developing myself so I can be of greater service to my clients. This has had a number of knock on effects elsewhere too.
It’s the little things in your life that give you the most joy
I have become a more conscious parent. I make sure I spend time with my two girls every day and I always apologise if I have reacted to their behaviour rather than responded to it. Learning to step back and not get triggered when they hurt each other or scream and shout takes huge amounts of self-control and I don’t always manage it. At those points I remind myself that each day gives me a fresh start to build a loving relationship with both daughters.
I can be this transparent because I am not afraid of what others will think of me, that’s their business, not mine. I am only responsible for myself. Arianna Huffington who modelled this in her talk at the Wisdom 2.0 conference this year has also inspired me. She had it all in the world’s eyes – status, money, recognition – and she collapsed from exhaustion. It took a severe wake up call for her to realise there was more to life.
I don’t want you or anyone to go to the edge in order to realise this. It is no longer necessary. Mindfulness is not the preserve of the new age, CEOs of a number of companies have openly stated that they use it every day to help them make more compassionate decisions. It is also a great way to develop panoramic (360) vision.
Inner peace and contentment are a thought away
Inner peace and contentment will not come when you buy that car you have been lusting after or when you finally get on the property ladder or get a promotion? You can create it right now whatever you are going through. If you are in denial, you will blame your state of mind on your poor health or your financial circumstances. Here’s the tough message: being a victim and feeling sorry for yourself, will only prolong the crap in your life. In a manner of speaking you are asking God, the Universe, Source (take whatever works for you) to keep on serving that up for you.
Be honest with yourself and ask yourself what you really love, what you are really passionate about? Listen to that voice inside yearning to connect with you and then take some baby steps towards fulfilling that dream. A first step could be becoming conscious about the words
you are using; it could include spending a few moments each to appreciate all the good things in your life. If you do that, there will be a shift and the magic will start to happen. When you are having fun, it all starts to flow –believe me I know. Initially it will take
concerted effort but overtime it will become an unconscious way of being. If all that seems impossible or too hard then consider coming on the two day PI programme that I run with Kath Roberts. Contact us for further info. Coltsfoot is a magical place and in the peace of that space we will show you how to co-create your reality.